Some Truths about Dying

My mother sent me a review of a new book by this title**. She said she was fascinated by the list of five regrets, and shared her thoughts about it (my mother is 89 years old):

“A beautiful article that all should read. It is rather surprising that so many folk have the same regrets. And how can we deal with another’s regrets unless they are willing to share and discuss them with us? This can be difficult, especially if we have lived with a person who has regrets which involve us!

On the source of regrets:
I believe many regrets depend on circumstances at the time which could not be changed. And regrets often involve folk who are hurting. It is part of our nature to be impulsive (eg, when we are under pressure), and we all have known times when we were sorry we didn’t think through our words, or how our actions might hurt someone. No matter how hard we try, we are not perfect, we make mistakes, we will hurt someone, and we will have regrets.

But regrets are not just for old folks near death. I find it hard to believe there might be someone who had no regrets at all. Young folk aren’t exempt from regrets. I was painfully shy as a child, and wished I could be more outgoing like my best friend. Life would have been a great deal easier if I had known how to deal with my shyness earlier than I did!

On dealing with regrets:
I believe regrets need to be brought out of hiding, dealt with, and fully let go. It’s not much different from asking for God’s forgiveness and accepting His mercy – this brings the only true cleansing. It’s hard, but only then can we find our own peace of mind. Without going into details, my toughest assignment by far came late in life – it hurt beyond measure — but in time after lots of chats with my Friend, I accepted His cleansing and now I can cope with it all. Although my heart still grieves, I have found peace.

On helping others with regrets:
Maybe we can help others to find this peace, even when close to death.
Certainly we can tell others about the book, which may help them decide to live differently and avoid the regret traps”.

Thank you Mom for sharing so transparently about this…..your words are like treasure!

The top five regrets of the dying (from the book**):
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier

Jesus to Nicodemus:
“For God so loved and prized the world that He gave up His unique Son, so that whoever trusts, clings to, and relies on Him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send the Son into the world in order to condemn the world, but that the world might find salvation, and be made safe and sound through Him” (John, chapter 3, Amplified Bible).

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Probing the practices of Christian believers….

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** The Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departed. By Bronnie Ware. (Hay House, USA).